she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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