mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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