People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Randomize
