For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
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