i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
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Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
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Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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