I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
wow bdsm is so cute
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
