i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
