well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.