Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.

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  (703): I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians. http://tfl.nu/fsi0
  Replies (8) Good night (1761) Bad night (465)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.

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  (864): The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college. http://tfl.nu/rxu2
  Replies (21) Good night (2739) Bad night (679)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"

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  (215): i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk" http://tfl.nu/65e9
  Replies (27) Good night (4396) Bad night (908)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.

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  (208): you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it. http://tfl.nu/lcjh
  Replies (22) Good night (701) Bad night (4022)
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  (949): View more from California

  you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."

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  (949): you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller." http://tfl.nu/aw6q
  Replies (19) Good night (6418) Bad night (795)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.

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  (586): he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck. http://tfl.nu/s6ky
  Replies (15) Good night (5311) Bad night (1032)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.

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  (651): Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me. http://tfl.nu/26ae
  Replies (7) Good night (3375) Bad night (923)
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  (805): View more from California

  How much is that going to cost?

  (1-805): View more from California

  A lot of beer.

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  (805): How much is that going to cost? (1-805): A lot of beer. http://tfl.nu/syqn
  Replies (3) Good night (1686) Bad night (561)
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  (707): View more from California

  Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.

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  (707): Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life. http://tfl.nu/o39j
  Replies (6) Good night (1367) Bad night (452)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow

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  (304): Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow http://tfl.nu/l8ph
  Replies (10) Good night (3988) Bad night (671)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished

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  (775): You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished http://tfl.nu/zdpg
  Replies (5) Good night (823) Bad night (441)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.

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  (917): Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly. http://tfl.nu/0uc8
  Replies (2) Good night (302) Bad night (977)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much

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  (413): So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much http://tfl.nu/o5r3
  Replies (1) Good night (560) Bad night (188)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later

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  (313): some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later http://tfl.nu/zhqr
  Replies (3) Good night (593) Bad night (262)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.

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  (203): I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left. http://tfl.nu/swl5
  Replies (6) Good night (271) Bad night (821)

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