I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
