I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Randomize
