idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
this will be a night to untag.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
