This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
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Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
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I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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