Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I am never drinking with the goths again.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
