Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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