In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
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There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂