I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
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All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
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I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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