gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
