It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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