How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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