im drinking this country out of the recession.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
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