I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I need to calm my uterus...
is that a dick in a sweater?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize