At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize