She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
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