Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Do vagina's smell?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize