He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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