I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Randomize