Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
