Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
