I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
