Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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