i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
