Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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