there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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