Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Who died my cat blue again?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
