You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
