Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Randomize
