i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
