I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
