I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
