Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
