I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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