My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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