you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
