I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
