quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
is this the sara with the beer cane?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
