hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
