Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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