ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize