halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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