he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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