shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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